My children, like most I suppose, do not know how to whisper. They demonstrate this best while in church. This is why we -- along with other parents whose children lack the ability to control their volume -- choose to sit in the balcony, where we can at least contain the noise.
Even though we sit in the “nose bleed” section, there have been several occasions where I was surprised we weren’t asked to leave because of the wrestling match going on between our children in the middle of The Lord’s Supper.
No amount of bargaining, stink-eye looks or threats made through clinched teeth makes a difference. I have learned that this just makes them louder.
My mother-in-law is shocked when she attends services with us. As soon as we leave she regales us with stories of how Jay never made a peep in church and at 2 years old, probably could have led the service on his own.
One Sunday the pastor had just made the last announcement and was leading congregants into the final prayer. I was so excited that we had almost made it through an entire service without as much as a peep from our kids. As I was about to give myself a pat on the back and thank Jesus for his divine intervention making my children behave, my youngest snapped me back into reality with a question.
In a tone that could only be described as blaring, he shouts out his query. While the timing was off, it could not have been more appropriate.
Mama! Shhhh Jack. We’re prayingMama! I have a question.Shhhh! What is it? And whisperWhat’s God’s last name?What?What’s God’s last name?
I came late to religion so this made me fear the wrong answer would be forthcoming. I searched and searched and finally, with beads of perspiration forming on my forehead, it came to me.
MAMA! What IS God’s last name?I think it’s Christ.
No it’s not! My husband chimed in. That’s Jesus’ last name.Well what is it then Mr. Know it All? I fumedI think it’s Almighty. Yep that’s it. God’s last name is definitely Almighty.About this time I caught the stare of my mother-in-law who was listening in on our conversation with a look of disdain. She got my husband’s attention and gave him that, “you need to be quiet” look. And before I could give her the “You’re not the boss of us” look, the prayer ended and like a flash my kids were up and out.
When I told friends about this conversation everyone shared a nervous laugh. I’m not sure if they laughed because I thought Jesus’ last name was Christ and Jay thought God’s last name was Almighty or maybe because none of us really knew the answer. Regardless, I think that little question was God’s way of telling me and Jay that it’s us who needs to pay more attention in Church.
Becky can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org
Check out all of Angel and Becky’s columns at www.wilsonpost.com under the style section.Telling Tales
Angel Kane and Becky Andrews live in Wilson County. This is their story (or tale) about their life, families and times that they share. Besides their weekly column Telling Tales Angel and Becky Co Founded Wilson Living Magazine. The idea of developing a magazine for Wilson County first came to Becky and Angel one afternoon while they sat on her back porch watching their children play in the backyard.
They were discussing the outpouring of emails, calls and responses to their column “Telling Tales” and wanted to find a way to capture that community spirit. People were stopping them wherever they went to share their own “tales.” They suddenly realized everyone has a story to tell and many of these stories were amazing. And in that moment, Wilson Living Magazine came to life. Be sure to check out Wilson Living Magazine at www.wilsonlivingmagazine.com
You can read Angel and Becky's weekly column on-line at www.wilsonpost.com under the Style section.