By ANGEL KANE
Wilson Living Magazine

WE are on a diet.

Because WE are going to the beach in five weeks.

And WE need to lose 15 pounds.

My husband and I have been having this discussion each and every Sunday evening for the past 15 plus years. And yet, every Monday morning, I find him in the kitchen, eating Cocoa Krispies with our children, as if WE were not dieting.

“WE are supposed to start out diet today!” I say in the most un-shrewish wife voice possible. (No really, I have a very pleasant voice. I’ve been told it’s very soothing.)

To which my husband responds, “Who is stopping you?”

Well that just sets me off, and of course, there is no way I can diet after being spoken to in that manner!

And so, 15 years later, I am still unable to lose those 15 extra pounds that I gained carrying his child to term.

I remember being pregnant with his first child, sitting in my doctor’s office, having gained 15 pounds my first trimester.

“You might want to cut back on the Snickers,” said my doctor. (No really, he said that, out loud, to me and it wasn’t in a soothing manner.)

Mortified, I responded, “I don’t eat Snickers!”

And then from somewhere in the back of the room, I heard this familiar voice. It sounded like Brody’s voice, but to this day, he swears it wasn’t him.

“She doesn’t eat Snickers, but she is eating the heck out of some Toll House Cookies.”

And that, my friends, is when WE started dieting.

This time is no different from all the others. On Sunday afternoon, I hit the grocery and fill the cart with cheese, eggs, almonds and beef jerky.

Because WE really lose weight quickly on a low-carb diet.

And on Sunday evening, WE discuss how the time has come to get healthy and lose those last few pounds. WE talk about all the miles we are going to run and how together WE can do it!

Problem is I don’t really think someone understands the whole WE part of this diet.

Because, once again, on Monday morning, I found Brody going from one cabinet to the next looking for his box of Krispies, which necessitated my reminding him that WE threw those out the night before.

What ensued was a very dignified discussion on all the reasons WE are dieting for real this time!

(No really. It wasn’t heated. Yes, the words Toll House did come up. And yes, I used the words in ways most people probably don’t use them. But, given my soothing tone, I think it went well.)